Boredom - what is happening here?
Lately, I have been encountering quite a few clients and friends expressing boredom in their lives. I, myself, know what it is like to experience this unpleasant state of mind and it took quite a bit of unpacking to shift boredom out of my own life.
The first question I asked myself (and my clients experiencing boredom themselves) was “What fear is driving your boredom?”. Boredom is characteristic of self-defeating behaviour which supports (or is supported by) a limiting belief. Once I understood this, I was able to identify why I allowed boredom to creep into my life. To step out of boredom meant to step out of my comfort zone which ultimately meant taking some steps that required me to be courageous. Living with boredom made me realised that I was violating my own values system, over and over again, and that I was letting limiting beliefs hold me back from being the person I know I am and living a life of meaning and purpose that was true for me.
Boredom is a very dangerous place to be. It kills creativity. It takes the joy out of life. It stifles one’s growth.
Boredom comes when there is too much certainty in one’s life. Certainty is good….to a point. To balance out our need for certainty, we turn to variety. Variety means adding spice to our lives so that we don’t face boredom. Just be careful here though and make sure that the spice you are adding to your life serves you and those around you in a good and positive way! When boredom creeps in because there’s too much certainty in your life, it would serve you to ask yourself what limiting belief do you have that demands you to have too much certainty.
Boredom comes from a lack of self-awareness. If you don’t know who you are, what your personal values are and what makes you genuinely happy, how can you expect to live a life that is stimulating, exciting and full of growth? By avoiding the journey within, we choose to expect our external world to provide us with stimulation instead of choosing to let the inner self provide the stimulation. By expecting the external to fulfil us, it won’t take long before boredom creeps in. So, it’s vital to figure out what the inner self needs in order to live a life full of happiness, adventure, peace and joy.
Boredom is a symptom of the “blame and justifying” game. When someone tells me they are bored, I ask them who is in control of their lives because it’s certainly not them! When we blame someone or justify something, we are not taking responsibility for ourselves. We are giving our personal power away to someone or something. Taking responsibility means we choose to NOT live a life that is boring.
Boredom is also an excellent wake-up call. When boredom strikes, it means reflection time. It means taking a step back from where you are so you can look at the bigger picture. It means asking yourself some seriously hard-hitting questions. It may mean leaving a job that no longer serves you, leaving a relationship that has run its’ course. It may mean turning inwards and asking yourself, “What is no longer serving me here?” or “Why am I choosing to stay in this bored state?”.
We must also see the light side of boredom, though and that is realising, that sometimes, one simply needs to rest. Boredom, in a healthy context, offers one the opportunity to switch off, do nothing and rejuvenate.
So, next time you are facing boredom in your life, ask yourself, “What is happening here?”.